Feedback Is The Breakfast of Champions!

Christians must humbly evaluate criticism in the light of Scripture.

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Feedback, especially the unrequested critical kind, can hurt badly. Recently I got some unsolicited negative feedback. How did I feel? Dejected, rejected, self-condemning? What did I do? Lash out, clam up, become bitter? Better yet, what do you do when you get unsolicited criticism?

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In this article I’d like to share 4 ways to handle feedback. The first three are harmful and the last one is helpful.

Here are 4 ways to handle unsolicited feedback:

01. Resent it.

This is a natural reaction to negative feedback and criticism. It stings and we don’t like it. So oftentimes we resent and reject it. But the problem with doing this is that we can’t learn from it.

Many years ago I heard a great phrase: Feedback (not Wheaties) is the breakfast of champions.

There is so much truth in that simple statement. To become great, we have to receive and implement feedback.

Someone has said, “Experience doesn’t make you better, only evaluated experience makes you better.” How true. If we keep repeating the same mistakes, we won’t grow. But when we evaluate our experiences, we can improve.

Sure, feedback is not always presented in the kindest way with the most tact. But with prayer and some determination, we can ask the Lord to teach us through it anyways.

Don’t resent criticism, be thankful for it.

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7 ESV)

02. Excuse it.

Sometimes we don’t just resent negative feedback, we excuse it. Here are some of the ways we excuse ourselves when criticized:

• By laughing it off

• By criticizing the criticizer (retaliation)

• By denying the criticized behavior

• By explaining away our actions

Psychologists call these kinds of behaviors “defense mechanisms.” We try to defend ourselves against criticism through these responses. But in the end, in defending ourselves, we may miss the opportunity to learn.

Feedback is sometimes hurtful but helpful when it comes from caring friends. Conversely, enemies often pay us compliments that are only lies meant to puff us up.

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” (Proverbs 27:6KJV)

03. Ignore it.

Another common response to negative feedback is to ignore it. Some are especially good at putting their head in the sand and ignoring issues.

Recently I was watching a documentary about President Ronald Reagan. It talked about his denial that members of his staff had traded “guns for hostages” in the Iran-contra affair. The program pointed out that it took Reagan a long time to admit the association. They suggested that because he was the adult child of an alcoholic (ACA), he was a natural at ignoring problems.

Similarly, others simply ignore negative feedback. But the tragedy is that if we ignore the issues we miss the opportunity to improve.

“Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.” (Ephesians 5:14 ESV)

04. Humbly evaluate feedback in the light of Scripture. 

What should we do with feedback and even negative criticism? We must evaluate it in the light of God’s Word.

Sure, there are times when it is inappropriately given; when it is said in a caustic way, meant to hurt us. But despite how it is said, we can learn from feedback.

Recently our church hired a consulting agency called The Unstuck Group. We’re paying thousands of dollars to receive their feedback.

Most of the time the feedback you and I get is free. That’s the best price, yet we often resent, excuse or ignore it!

Years ago I got some feedback from someone who clearly had unhealthy motivations. Criticism was given with an attitude that seemed to be saying “I don’t like you and here’s why.” It wasn’t fun. I wanted to but couldn’t say, “You think I’ve got a few little problems. Well, let me tell you, you’re a real jerk.”

Thankfully I didn’t say that and tried to be as gracious as possible. And as it turns out, upon further evaluation of the criticisms, there was some great truth in them. I later went through some professional mentoring that helped me see the same blind spots and improve.

So here’s the bottom line: Negative feedback is painful whether we learn anything from it or not. Why not turn the pain into gain? Let’s humbly evaluate criticism in the light of Scripture and use it to grow. Let’s let feedback become the breakfast of a champion.

Let’s practice Proverbs 27:17; “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” (ESV)

For more help with criticism, confidence, rejection, bullying and insults, check out these articles I’ve written:

• How to Find Confidence in a Critical World and Stay Humble

• How to Survive Rejection and Find Acceptance Today

• How Reluctant Leaders Become Confident Achievers for God

• Having Just One Person to Please Brings Peace

• 6 Strategies to Handle Insults Without Becoming a Doormat

• Faith Means Acting When You Feel Inadequate

• You Can Do It!

• Video vlog: Have You Been Pecked At?

NOTE: Facebook is random. Email is reliable. Subscribe via email and you won’t miss any of my articles, podcasts or videos. You’ll also get my eBook: 10 Prayers to Unlock Heaven on Earth

Can Born Again Christians Be Demonized?

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This question is very controversial: Can born again Christians be demonized? Some feel strongly that it is impossible. They are almost offended by the question. Others aren’t so sure. Still others feel this is very much possible and happens frequently.

Bishop Garry Bryant

Many thanks to my guest Bishop Garry Bryant for giving some great responses in answer to this question of whether or not born again Christians can be demonized.

To listen to this podcast just hit the play button above.

Who is Garry?

Garry Bryant is a native Virginian and the son of a Pentecostal Holiness Minister. He has served as a Senior Pastor, as Conference Christian Education Director, and as Bishop of Redemption Ministries. His ministry goal is to raise-up the body of Christ in effective ministry to carry out the Great Commission.  Garry and his wife LaDawn have two children, Dreama and Garryt. They reside in Oklahoma City, OK, where Garry presently serves as Assistant Director for EVUSA with the International Pentecostal Holiness Church and as the National Field Director of ACTS2DAY Ministries.

Garry and I recently traveled together to India. While there we sat down and chatted about the issue of demonization in general in the last podcast. Then we recorded this second podcast on the question of whether or not genuine Christians can be demonized.

The following Scripture passages relate to the issue of born again Christians being demonized:

1 Corinthians 10:20 “But I say, that the things which the Gentiles sacrifice, they sacrifice to devils, and not to God: and I would not that you should have fellowship with devils.”

1 Peter 5:8 “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour”

“Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” (1 John 4:4 ESV)

“The next day an evil[a] spirit from God came forcefully on Saul. He was prophesying in his house, while David was playing the lyre, as he usually did. Saul had a spear in his hand and he hurled it, saying to himself, ‘I’ll pin David to the wall.’ But David eluded him twice.” (1 Samuel 18:10-11 NIV)

“Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. With his wife’s full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles’ feet. Then Peter said, ‘Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? Didn’t it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn’t the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God.’ When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard what had happened. Then the young men came forward, wrapped up his body, and carried him out and buried him. About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter asked her, ‘Tell me, is this the price you and Ananias got for the land?’ ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘that is the price.’ Peter said to her, ‘How could you agree to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look! The feet of the men who buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out also.’ At that moment she fell down at his feet and died. Then the young men came in and, finding her dead, carried her out and buried her beside her husband. Great fear seized the whole church and all who heard about these events.” (Acts 5:1-11)

For more help understanding what the Bible says about the devil, demons and God’s Holy Spirit see these resources on my website:

• Why and when does the devil attack?

• Opposition often means you’re right on track

• 3 Steps to Get the Help You Need Today

• Podcast: Is it necessary to pray to be filled with the Spirit?

• Video vlog: Wilderness Gardens Mill, the Word and the Spirit

To learn more about this “Christianity Questions and Answers” podcast and how to submit your questions, click HERE.

To receive Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord click HERE.

To develop your relationship with God, get my free eBook “10 Prayers to Unlock Heaven on Earth” click HERE.

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The Goal Of The Great Commission Is Disciples

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Making disciples is vital. That’s why I recently announced the founding of a new ministry called “Discipleship Journeys with Jesus” (DJJ). The Lord laid it on my heart to start this new ministry in order to meet the crucial need of making committed disciples around the world.

Baptism scene in India last month

In His Great Commission Jesus said: “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:18-20 ESV)

Jesus’ parting command was to “make disciples.” But what is a disciple? The original Greek word is MATHETES. It means “someone catechized with proper instruction from the Bible with its necessary follow-through (life-applications).”

An easy description is a devoted follower. MATHETES was used for followers of John the Baptist in Matthew 9:14 and of others such as the Pharisees in Matthew 22:16.

We must not be confused by unbiblical, or even biblical substitutes for true biblical disciples:

01. Unbiblical substitutes for disciples:

There are several often-practiced unbiblical substitutes for real disciples:

a. Decisions

Becoming a follower of Jesus begins with a decision, this is true. But it is only the beginning. The Great Commission doesn’t say “Go therefore into all the world and make decisions.”

The problem in settling with “decisions” is that decisions don’t mean the full depth of being disciples. In fact, sometimes decisions don’t mean much at all!

Have you ever made a decision to do something and then did virtually nothing about it? Better question: who hasn’t? New Year’s Resolutions are a great example. The statistics say that a little over half of Americans make New Year’s resolutions, but only 8 percent succeed in meeting their goals.

Decisions for Jesus which are not followed by actions mean nothing. See Matthew 7:21-23.

b. Sympathizers

Sympathizers are better than enemies, but are still less than Christ’s command to make disciples.

In the USA and other “Christianized” countries, we have many sympathizers of Christ. They think Jesus was a great moral teacher, an exemplary person, a good example. But they are not disciples.

This is nothing new: Jesus faced the same issue. Pontius Pilate is a good example. He was the Roman governor of Judea who declared Jesus innocent of all charges, symbolically washed his hand of the blood of Christ and then turned Him over to be crucified! See Matthew 27:24-26.

Pilate’s “sympathy” resulted in Jesus’ execution! It’s nice that Pilate was sympathetic, but he was still an enemy of Jesus.

Jesus said, “Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.” (Matthew 12:30 ESV)

2. Biblical substitutes for disciples:

Let’s go a little deeper. There are several often-practiced biblical substitutes for real disciples. These are substitutes that born again Christians become confused about:

a. Baptisms

There are two participles in the Great Commission. They are both vitally important, but not the end goal. The first is baptizing. Being baptized is one of the important first steps of obedience in being disciples of the Master.

Last month I was in India and got to witness the baptism of about 15 new believers from Hindu background. It was the highlight of my trip!

But while baptism is important, it is not the goal. The goal is disciples.

The leaders in India know that. That’s why they are interested in the materials that will be developed through our new DJJ ministry. Their goal is disciples not just baptisms!

b. Bible knowledge

The other participle in the Great Commission is “teaching.”

Some people love teaching and learning. Indeed, they are vitally important. But these are not the goal. The goal is devoted followers of Jesus who don’t just know biblical information but practice it.’

Nikita Khrushchev, former Premier of the Soviet Republic, was diligently taught the Bible as a child. He had memorized large portions of the Bible. It is possible he even memorized the entire four Gospels.

Yet he was an avowed atheist and gave “unyielding support to political bloodshed.” He met his arrest quotas and personally signed death sentences for many Russians, some of whom had been his personal friends. Under his leadership many churches were closed. He was a greater enemy of Christ than even Stalin.

Have you known people who know the Bible well, but act contrary to it? Have you been one of them?

We must teach the Bible, but more importantly we must live out the Bible and help other disciples to do the same!

“But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves.” (James 1:22 NLT)

03. Biblical disciples:

So what are real disciples? A great article by Hans Kvalbein outlines the Great Commission and then gives 13 theses on discipleship.

Here is his outline of the Great Commission:

a.  A declaration of power: “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.”

b. The commission goal: “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations.”

c. The commission means: “baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you.

d. A Promise: “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Here are four of Kvalbein’s 13 theses as summarized by John Starke in an article titled “Give Up Your Weak Definition of ‘Disciple’”:

• The first word for Christians was not “Christians” but “disciples.” Newcomers to the faith saw themselves in relationship to the risen Lord Jesus in some way similar to the relationship of the first disciples to the earthly rabbi Jesus.

• A disciple learns by hearing his Master and doing like his Master. This is explicitly commanded by Jesus in John 13: “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I your Lord and Teacher have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set an example that you should do as I have done for you.”Life as a disciple is “death and resurrection” with Christ, inaugurated in Christian baptism. Baptism is initiation into discipleship, giving admittance to the “school” of Jesus and starting a new life in obedience to him and his commands.

• To be a disciple is to be called to make new disciples. Throughout the New Testament, the term “disciple” is a dynamic concept. It implies multiplication. All nations have been invited to this mission. “He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world” (1 John 2:2).

Questions (please leave your thoughts below): What shows that you are a true disciple of Jesus? How are you helping others become true disciples?

For more help with discipleship, mentoring, evangelism and church planting see these resources on my website:

• 3 P’s of Evangelism

• One of the Worst Christian Quotes Ever

• The Top 10 Reasons to Plant New Churches Now

• The Power of Mentoring

• 4 Great Questions to Ignite Passion for Evangelism in a Lost World

• Podcast: What’s the value of 1 to 1 discipleship?

NOTE: Facebook is random. Email is reliable. Subscribe via email and you won’t miss any of my articles, podcasts or videos. You’ll also get my eBook: 10 Prayers to Unlock Heaven on Earth